a big stupid idiot crush
Put a ship/OTP in my inbox from any fandom and I will only react with a gif
Im pretty sure I walk past a lot more cops than that
*unconsciously touches own boobs in public* *remembers im not suppose to do that*
my niece holds her bottle with her feet
WOMAN WEARS BLACK BRA WITH BLACK OUTFIT. CONTACT THE PRESS, CALL THE PRESIDENT DO NOT LET THE CHILDREN SEE.
Two scientists walk into a bar
The first says “I’ll have some H2O.”
The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.”
Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.
the other version
the 2 types of parents when it comes to letting kids stay home from school
Uterus, I do not understand your need to have a baby. We cannot afford a baby. I do not want a baby. Hell you wouldn’t even be happy if we had a baby. I find these temper tantrums you throw every month we don’t have a baby absolutely unacceptable.
I’m glad that Bilbo Baggins exists
Because in the book, the dude was pretty firmly middle aged when his crazy-ass adventure started
He was settled down in the house that belonged to his parents and had done precisely jack shit with his life
It gives me hope that maybe some nutcase wizard will eventually show up and be like yo
you’re a burglar now
don’t even care that you didn’t roll rogue homie we got dragons to slay and kingdoms to save